Stereotypical Women

Recently, I have irked some people by notating that

The responses varied. One claimed that she was simply looking forward to being able to wear non-maternity clothes for the first time in a year. One agreed but had been afraid of the ire of the mommy bloggers to broach the subject himself. Another seemed to think it is ingrained in us and that is what I tend to believe as well. For the record, yes I did ask Crocs to provide me with a free pair of shoes and I would espouse their wonderment. Some seem to think this is a two-faced act based upon my statement. But I clearly put myself in the same group as everyone else, as I too am wondering if what I wear to each party will help me to "fit in".

BlogHer was rough for me last year, and I have repeatedly vowed to myself that I won't let that happen again. That I won't let myself think other's are more deserving than me, that I don't fit in or belong in their company because my blog is small. But then I see tweets and blog posts about all the new clothes and shoes and hair do's and manis and pedis and waxing that so many are doing and I think, really? Why, can't we all just be the same person we are online?

What initially started the feeling of "amazement" for me was the fact that Tim Gunn of Project Runway fame will be at BlogHer this year (as will Carson Kresley from Queer Eye). It put women into a tizzy over what will Tim Gunn think of their outfits. On top of that there is a contest on the website to put up your pic of what you'll be wearing. Again, a conference that is supposed to be empowering women, is focusing on clothing and looks.

When will women be respected for everything but their looks? Will they then feel insulted that someone didn't notice their new harido even though they praised them on the vaccine they created?

Recently, Megan was putting on makeup in my car and asked me why I didn't wear any. I told her I didn't need it. She asked if I didn't want to "feel pretty". I told her that not only did I feel pretty but I knew I was pretty. She countered with but make up makes you feel even prettier. Having that conversation made me sad. Sad that girls are still feeling obligated to "feel pretty".

Erin had a quandry not too long ago regarding shopping with her daughter, she has always taught her to be independant and know that she can do anything her brother does, that their gender has nothing to do with who they are or what they can become. However, her daughter asked to "go shopping like girl's do", and it threw mom into a tizzy. Is she failing as a feminist if she enjoys a girlie shopping day with her daughter? Does it make her a proponent of female stereotypes? No, it makes her a mom.

I guess, we just all need to pick and choose who we are and who we want to be. And if that means, you wear make-up to make you feel pretty, or play dress up to feel girlie or go for tea lunch and shopping to bond with your daughter, then so be it.

Speaking of dress up, how freaking cute is Caity?

Tide Loads of Hope

When Marisa was little, she would run around the apartment in VA, mimicking a tv commerical, specifically "If it's gotta be clean it's gotta be Tide!" At 3 years old she was sold on Tide detergent. Now 20 years later (ack!) Tide is still going strong and doing it's share to help out those in need.

Tide Loads of Hope helps in the aftermath of a natural disaster by providing clean clothes and a sense of comfort to families in need. Partnering with Feeding America, we travel to disaster affected neighborhoods with the Tide Loads of Hope truck or vans, our free mobile laundry service.

Where it all started In the wake of Hurricane Katrina, the need for clean clothing became critical, and Tide found a way to help. So in November 2005, the Tide Loads of Hope truck headed to Camp Hope in the Metairie, LA area and cleaned over 10,000 loads of laundry. The spirit of this first venture informs and inspires everything Tide Loads of Hope program does.

Tide Loads of Hope truck:
32 high-effiency washers and dryers stationed on the truck
Can do 300 wash and dry cycles a day -equal to one year's worth of laundry for a single family
Will wash about 9,000 loads of laundry over a four-week period
Leveraged during massive disasters where electricity is unavailable in the region

Tide Loads of Hope vans:

In partnership with a local laundromat, the Tide Loads of Hope vans provide free laundry service at the same load rate as the trucks
Leveraged during disasters where neighboring communities still have a source of electricity

To date, Tide Loads of Hope has washed more than 35,000 loads of laundry for over 20,000 families. Most importantly, the Tide Loads of Hope program means we're equipped to take action whenever and wherever there is a need in our country.

Tide Loads of Hope Vintage Tees: Tide Loads of Hope can also be supported through the purchase of a Tide Vintage Tee. All profits go to support families affected by disaster.

If you would like to help this venture futher, you can purchase a Vintage Tee from the link above 100% of all proceeds from the t-shirt sales go directly to the program.

I'm Going!

WANNA JOIN ME?

My Vote Doesn't Count

I am tired of listening to people say their vote doesn't count. That the Electoral College chooses the President no matter what the popular vote is. It is balderdash!

Yes the Electoral College determines the Presidency, but do you really know how that works? Other than what you learned in high school?

We saw in 2000 Al Gore win the popular vote but George Bush win the election. Just like in the Primaries where one candidate receives a certain number of delegates based on the voting percentage, that is how the electoral college works, sort of. If you "win" the state, you win their electoral votes. And unlike all men, all states are not created equal, they are each assigned a certain number of electoral votes as per Wikipedia: "Each state has a number of electors equivalent to its total Congressional representation (in both houses), with the non-state District of Columbia receiving three electors and other non-state territories having no electors."

That being said, it all breaks down to simple math. I know "I HATE MATH"! Not me, mon petit, I lurv math!

So, in order for your candidate to win your state YOU have to go vote for him/her! It really is that simple. To put it in even simpler terms, the difference in Florida in 2000 was 537 votes. 537, is an unimaginably low number. Can you imagine if 538 more people had decided to vote that day and voted for Gore? Our world would be entirely different, yes our World not just our Nation! Are you one of the 538 that didn't vote?

Do you still think your vote doesn't count?

I have been very vocal this election. Mainly because I truly thought for a long time that my vote wouldn't count. I would cast it that was not the question, but the events in my life lately have led me to believe that my vote would be legally disenfranchised.

Just last week I found out that wasn't the case, that my circumstance did not warrant disenfrachisement. I can not tell you how long I cried knowing that my vote would count. That my voice would not be squashed. That I can exercise my right and privilege to cast my vote for our next President.

I can not say it loud enough or often enough. I don't care who you vote for, that is your personal opinion. But I do care that you VOTE!

Cross posted at BlogHer

Best Laid Plans...........

Initially in this post I was going to compare and contrast the two Hybrid cars I drove over the last couple of months. The GM Malibu to and from BlogHer and the Ford Escape I used this past weekend.




To be fair it wouldn't be a true comparison as one is a mid-sized sedan and one is a CUV. The handling is different the ride is different the spatial environment is totally different. And most of all because of the vehicle types the mpg's are going to be different.



So I set out to just form my opinion on the Escape and give you the down low on that for a ride to and from Oakland Ca. an approximate 750 miles. Best laid plans............ (more on that later).




The car is delivered and was beautiful, I have never liked the color green much but this was a pretty “kiwi green” according to the person dropping it off (wonder if he liked the fresh baked cookies I gave him?). I didn't want my initial drive to be at 4am so I took Kiwi for a spin up to Burbank. I took the side streets there and the freeway back to try and gauge any difference in the handling and ride of the Hybrid. I was very impressed with both. Of course on such a short drive I couldn't properly average out the mpg.



At 4am the next morning, Adam, his friend Luis and I ventured out to the open road. The back back was spacious enough for our three bags and a cooler and we even experimented with putting half of the back seat down for easy access. Since Luis was the king of the back seat area the configuration was totally up to him. I asked him many times during the trip if he had enough leg room and such and he always replied yes. Since he is such a polite kid (what's up with teenagers these days?) I climbed back there myself to see if he was telling me the truth. He was. While I don't know that I would want to have someone else back there with me for a “road trip” it was fairly comfortable.



We made great time and mileage. Although I could have probably made it into the city before running low on gas, I didn't want to take the chance and filled up while we had breakfast. We ate at the Apricot Inn (or something like that), almost everything on the menu had apricots in or on it. The décor was fabulous tons and tons of old lunch boxes on the walls and matching thermos' in plexiglass dividers between booths.



The boys concert (Matches and Wombats were the two bands they most wanted to see) ended in the early evening so we opted to run up to San Francisco to hit a great record store Rasputins. Guess what running up to SF consists of? Yep that Damn Bridge again, ugh. Of course I did it and I didn't even cry this time. But coming back was on the lower level and very very freaky. Shopping for cheap cd's, hole in the wall pizza and a scare where I thought I was pick pocketed (Adam put my money in a different spot of my wallet) and some Cold Stone ice cream set us on the road again.



Luis and I wanted to find the “crookedest” street in SF. We were certain it was Lombard but the Sync took us only to parts that were straight. We drove around a lot. And all of it was at under 30 mph so for almost an hours worth of driving around on the hills of SF we used less than 1 gallon of gas. It was great. BTW we never did find that crooked street.



A nice relaxing night and some internet issues in the morning got us ready for a very yummy breakfast at the Marriott. Noon was check out time and also the opening time for the record stores in Berkeley so off we went. What a beautiful town. Walking up and down College and Telegraph where there were sidewalk sales and fun people watching. The boys shopped at Rasputins and Amoeba and then we were on the road again.



About an hour into our drive we are doing about 70 on the 580 just past Livermore CA and we start hearing a repetitive clicking noise. At first I thought it was Adams cell phone vibrating against the center console, but it was too loud and lasted too long, so I pulled over into a turn out.



Picture this if you will. Brown rolling hills, windmills and dead donkeys. Yes, that is all there was around us other than cars whizzing by at 70 mph. The boys get out and look to see if something is stuck in the tire but see nothing, so thinking whatever it was is now gone we get back in and start off again. Oooops nope, there's that noise again, pull over again. Thank goodness for turn outs.

I make a phone call to the Ford Reps from Page One and depending on who's side of the story you hear (and since this is my side that is the one you will hear), I calmly explained our predicament and requested assistance. (of course some of that calm may have included loud voices and mild hysterics but eh, there was a dead donkey nearby!) Long story short (too late for that) and the wonderful AAA guy Mike from Reed & Son Towing found us a Ford dealership to drop off poor Kiwi and deposited us at a Denny's to wait for a replacement car.

The replacement car was being arranged by Stuart from Page One who faced the brunt of my calmness throughout this entire ordeal and did a fabulous job of listening, empathizing and solving my problem. Awesome customer service.

The boys and I had a leisurely dinner and dessert at Dennys (which Page One picked up the tab for, thank you again) and 4 hours after the first noise was heard we were on the road again in our new 09 Mercury Mariner Hybrid.

The Mariner and the Escape are identical twins. Although the boys liked the comfort of the supple leather seats in the Escape as compared to the cloth seats of the Mariner.

Again on the ride home, good time and good mileage was had by all and we made it home just after midnight.

For the entire trip we averaged 27 mpg. Not a great number, but again a Hybrid is not meant for highway driving, so when you take into account that the cars are CUV's that mileage is pretty good.

As far as comfort and drivablility, I have one major complaint for both cars. I could not see out of the rearview mirror unless there was no one sitting there and I removed the headrests from the back seat. Thankfully the side mirrors were large and awesome, because that is all I used.

The navigation system (other than Lombard street, but to be fair, I didn't have an exact address) was great and the bluetooth ability was very handy in the SYNC. Although in neither car could we get the voice activation to work and the owner's manual said to see the SYNC manual which we didn't have.

What conclucions have I come to driving these three cars?
A. Hybrids are great for city drivers, not so much for highway
B. I am ready to move out of the “mommy” cars and into a sedan.
C. Whatever car I get next will definitely have satellite radio!

I have to give proper shout outs to Dan Smith of PCGCampbell, Stuart (I'm sorry I don't know your last name) from Page One Automotive and Jason Camp of Ford.

BTW the noise? Was due to some packaging material still on the drive train that started hitting against the heating vent with each revolution. Something completely harmless and insignificant. Thank goodness!

Should You Buy a Hybrid?

When I attended a media event at Ford last month, I learned about Partial Zero Emissions Vehicles (PZEV). According to Ford a 2008 PZEV produces 73% less smog-forming emissions than the average new car.

To qualify as a PZEV a car must meet three criteria:
*The vehicle must meet extremely low tailpipe emissions standards (AKA Super Ultra Low Emissions Vehicle).
*It must meet a zero-evaporative-emissions standard.
*It must be warranted to meet these emissions standards for 15 years or 150,000 miles.

Although Ford as a parent company is the current leader in PZEVs, more and more manufacturers are producing them each year.

Why am I talking about PZEVs when this article was supposed to be about Hybrids? Because if you are not going to drive under 30mph for more than 75% of your driving needs than a Hybrid really is not serving it's purpose for you. And if you will not be served by a Hybrid then how can you still do your part for the environment by not contributing to the acrid air problems? By buying a PZEV! Note not all Hybrids are PZEV, please make sure you ask before you buy!

Some more interesting facts about PZEV (as taken from a Ford pamphlet):
*A vehicle with a PZEV rating emits about two pounds of hydrocarbons during 100,000 miles of driving – the equivalent of spilling a pint of gasoline.
*A PZEV-rated vehicle would have to be driven more than 2,100 miles to equal the emissions produced by a 5.4 horsepower lawn mower in one hour of use!
*BBQing one hamburger produces the same smog-forming emissions as driving a PZEV car for 3 hours or 180 miles!

When I heard these facts I was amazed that it was for the first time. Why is this information not out in the open? Why is there so much hype about Hybrids (which effectly only properly serve less than half of the people that own them) and nothing about PZEV? I am here to try to rectify that.

Back to Hybrids. Hybrids are a great idea, again if you travel at under 30mph for more than 75% of your driving time. Another bonehead move made by the California government was to give Prius owners a sticker that allowed them to drive in the HOV lanes. Which totally defeats the purpose of a Hybrid. Those drivers would get better mileage driving in the stop and go traffic of LA than they do zooming past everyone at 70 mph.

I have 3 sisters all talking about buying Hybrids. For one I would definitely not recommend it. While her daily commute to and from work is (I believe) approx 10 miles, she then drives almost 200 miles to her home every weekend. For that weekend ride, the Hybrid would suck up in gas what she saved during the week. And with the cost of a Hybrid at about $3000 more than it's counterpart it would take more than the estimated time to get her payback.

According to Consumer Reports October 2008 issue, some Hybrid cars are still eligible for Federal Tax Credits. “The incentives fade out once an automaker produces 60,000 Hybrids, 9including ALL of it's brands”. Toyota (including Lexus) is done. Honda incentives will expire Dec. 31, 2008. With Ford now producing the Escape, and Fusion hybrids along with the Mercury brands of Mariner and Milan, it too will be done soon. These tax credits can range from $500 to $2,500. You can get more information on them from http://www.fueleconomy.gov/feg/taxcenter.shtml

Make note of your driving habits before you make a commitment to your next car. In the economy we are in right now, does it make sense for you to spend more to not necessarily reap the benefits of that purchase? If a Hybrid fits into your lifestyle than rock on with your bad self!

If not, then would you please make sure your next car is a PZEV?

*This article is cross-posted at BlogHer and Blissfully Domestic

Operation Baking Gals

This is such an amazing effort being made by these great ladies. I have signed up to help. I would hope that you would like to help as well. It doesn't take much to bake some cookies, the packaging might be a pain in the ass, but when you put it in the terms of what they are doing over there meh, packaging schmackaging.

If you want to sign up to help all you have to do is email bakinggals@gmail.com they will set you up. If you want to just help me do mine then email me avanhouten@sbcglobal.net either way, start your ovens!

BlogHer09

Look to your left.

Yes YOUR left, see it?

See the survey? Take it.

If you are related to me and really don't give two shakes about the survey then vote my proxy - LAS VEGAS!

Kids and Cell Phones

Cross posted at BlogHer

During the Newbie reception at BlogHer08 I met the representatives from T-Mobile. They had a table set up with a survey about parenting and cell phones. Although my kids are older now this is an issue that I dealt with some years ago when cell phones for kids weren’t as big of an issue than they are now.
My son got his first cell phone at the age of 13, my daughter at 16. He was very active in sports, she in high school and we were travelling to a family reunion of sorts and my sister and I wanted the kids to have the phones so that we could be in contact at all times. If my memory serves me right it was the T-Mobile family plan, but I could be wrong. Boy did I hear from the other sisters. Never directly but the tone was implied that this was just another way of “spoiling” my kids.
Over time those phones have been taken away and given back and taken away again. The Girl is now grown and pays her own plan. And the Boy is still on a family plan with my sister. They have more options now with texting, the internet, email and probably many other options that I am not even aware of. But then it wasn’t an issue. Then it was Boy is going to be at baseball practice and I don’t have to stick around the whole time, I can do what I do best – multi-task – and run errands and such, then he can call when it is time to pick him up. During the later years, that phone came in very handy on Prom night when Boy texted that they were leaving the Prom and heading to the bowling alley. Knowing that I would be waiting for a text to say he arrived, he called moments later and said that there had been an accident behind them and that if I saw anything on the news it didn’t involve them they were all fine. The kids and I text back and forth often, it is a perfect way of communicating quick thoughts that don’t need a full on phone call. (Kinda like Twittering)
The questions on the T-Mobile survey were pretty innocuous I thought. What is the big deal about kids having phones? It makes planning and sports and scouts and all the other extracurricular activities easier to handle right? But like I mentioned earlier, I guess there are issues and options that I am too out of touch to be aware of.
At what age should children have a mobile phone?
My answer to this one varied. Really it depends on the kid, the activities and the environment. But having to pick only one, I chose Middle School.

· 15% - Grade School
· 48% - Middle School
· 31% - High School
· 6% - Never; only adults should have mobile phones.


What would motivate you the most to buy your child a phone?
Again I have to fall back on the answer above and fluctuate between Safety and Coordination, couldn’t they be considered one in the same? I chose Coordination as we lived in a pretty safe area at the time of the kids getting their phones.

· 70% - Safety (knowing they can always reach me)
· 20% - Coordinating busy schedules (pick-ups, etc.)
· 4% - Social (keeping them in touch with family and friends)
· 6% - Nothing; I don’t think children should have phones.

What concerns you the most about providing your child with a mobile phone?
This one threw me for a loop. Surprise bills, yeah we had those when the Girl went OVER her minutes and then OVER everyone else’s minutes. But not because of texting and downloading, that wasn’t an option in the stone age. My answer was “Losing my child’s attention”. Only recently did I become aware of the worry facing some parents about who their child is texting or talking to. A friend’s granddaughter is not allowed to text because her parents can’t control it. The older wiser me says to relax and let her text, really is it that big of a deal? You can always go in and read the texts if needed. Of course, having had a teenage girl and remembering the hellish times, part of it makes sense.

· 30% - Surprise bills because my child would text or download too much without my knowledge.
· 46% - Not knowing who my child is talking or texting with.
· 11% - Losing my child’s attention when we are together because they’re using their phone instead of engaging in the moment.
· 12% - Access to inappropriate content.

If you were considering buying a mobile phone for your child, what would be the #1 purchase factor?
Price is always the number one factor for me. Everything costs too damn much! But I guess when you look at the question above, than the answer given most makes more sense.

· 26% - Cost of service.
· 65% - Ability to manage usage (example: set limits on minutes, texting, times of use and available features).
· 1% - Choice of phones.
· 5% - Network/coverage.

Of course the idea behind T-Mobile being at the conference was a marketing ploy for their Family Allowance Plan, looking at the survey it looks like they nailed it on the head.
With Family Allowances, parents can easily:
· Set limits on the time of day when the phone may be used.
· Avoid surprise bills by managing their child’s allowance of minutes, messages and downloads via a simple Web-based interface.
· Set limits on who can/can’t call or send text messages to the phone.
· Stay connected with their kids worry free with “always allowed numbers.”

This is not a paid advertisement, this isn’t even an endorsement. I'm a Sprint customer.

But I am totally interested in your opinions on the survey and your own experience with kids and cell phones.

Saga Roundup

All in all I would do it over again in a heartbeat! I truly hope to find myself in a situation that allows me to attend next year, wherever it may be. Perhaps by then I will have grown a pair and will be able to just walk up to people, or perchance I will just float along like I did this year. I won't know until it happens, and I'm ok with that.

Saga VIII

Monday, July 21, 2008

Yummy breakfast at Lori’s diner starts my day. I meet up with my carmates Tiff and Missy and away we go. We actually leave the hotel and get gas and get on the road about 1pm. And since I am taking the 101 I don’t have to cross that Bridge again.

Missy is from Darwin (by way of Adelaide) Australia and has travelled up here for BlogHer and various other stops in the states to meet Bloggers that she reads.

Tiff it turns out lives close to my family in Ann Arbor and her mom even graduated from my rival High School in Livonia. So we had lots to talk about all the way home.

We met Suebob in Seeward to hand over the leftover luggage and lo and behold there was an IN-n-Out there. We had just been talking about In-n-Out as being one of the best burger places and they both wanted to try it, so that took care of dinner. They were going to be staying with a friend of Tiff’s in So. Cal. For a few days so I drove past my house and waved and continued on down to Fullerton to drop them off.

All in all not too bad, I was home in my chair in time for The Mole at 10pm.

Saga VII

Sunday, July 20, 2008


A lot of people left today but I was staying for the “Unconference”. Essentially it is a DIY day of smaller sessions. There is a blank Agenda Wall along with the principles of Open Space and the Law of Two feet. Anyone who wants to present CAN - no sessions will be culled. Basically if you want to present, or lead a discussion you write your topic down on a 8.5x11 paper, tell us about it and put what you have to offer on the agenda wall. When this is done we have our day...talking about what we want to talk about in the time/space slots. I think I got more out of these sessions than all of the regular conference sessions because they were more intimate. I was able to better follow along and even implement some of the suggestions and ideas right then and there. It was also during these sessions that I found out I would have car mates for the ride home.

Afterwards Califmom and I were treated to a lovely dinner at Sear’s Fine Diner by Shannonrenee. And while the food was very good the company was even better.

Sunday evening was spent alone in my room decompressing and packing. During lunch Sunday as I was walking through the lobby, I overheard someone mention Suebob’s luggage. I turned and sure enough Suebob had left one of her bags sitting in the lobby and she was now headed down the 101 on her way home to Ventura. I called her up immediately and offered to drop it off on the way home.

Saga VI

Upstairs in my room after keynote and again “do I go do I stay?” “do I wear the dress I brought, or put on my pj’s?” I logged on to the Mommytalk pity party and quickly surprise them with a giveaway of one of the pink wireless mice I won from HP. That was fun and the feedback I had received from the earlier BlogHer post propelled me to get off my ass and go to the reception. I did not wear the dress (the one from Mel’s wedding) because I realized it didn’t have pockets and I did not bring a purse.

I didn’t have a clue where I was going (it was not at the hotel but at Macy’s) but I followed the throng of women walking the streets of SF and found my way easily enough (in heels even). Along the way I ran into Suebob and her red stapler. It was guess what? HOT CROWDED AND LOUD! Macy’s had roped off certain areas of the store for our private party. The first spot was the Purses section (free gift with purchase and an extra 11% off any sale price, these women were shopping!)

I see everyone milling about enjoying the free champagne so I start looking for the bar. I find a waiter and request a water,
Her: “Sorry ma’am can I give you a champagne?”
Me: “No, I asked for a water”
Her: “We have White tea if you would like.”
Me: “No, I would LIKE a water, please (emphasis on the PLEASE)”
Her: “I’m sorry we’re not serving water but you can have FREE champagne.”
Me: “Look, I know it is hard to fathom that not everyone that comes to these things is not totally enamored with your FREE champagne, but I am overheating in this small space filled with 1,000 women and would really like some water, PLEASE.”
Her: “uh”
Me: “Ok, it’s obvious you don’t actually have anything to do with that decision so point me towards someone who doesn’t play this game part time.”
She points me towards a Macy’s employee. Who doesn’t have a clue but is smart enough to point me towards a manager as soon as she makes eye contact with me.
Manager: “Can I help you ma’am?”
Me: “Only if you can procure a bottle of water.”
Manager: “Water will be served on the second floor when we move up there in 20 minutes.”
Me: “So, in the meantime I am supposed to be hot and thirsty. And don’t offer me champagne, did it occur to you people that not everyone drinks alcohol?”
Manager: “Ma’am, the caterers have done a fine job of supplying everyone with champagne and tea for this first part of the party.”

Me: “You are obviously not listening to me, I want water. Let me leave this section and find a drinking fountain, it is absolutely unheard of to not have water available.” It would not be difficult at this point to hear my voice anywhere else in the store even over the muzac at this point.
Manager (obviously getting nervous): “Let me see if I can find a Macy’s water for you at one of the registers.”
She walks away and comes back with an emergency water bottle that is kept behind the counter just in case.
Manager: “Ma’am, I would appreciate it if you didn’t advertise this. I got this only for you.”
Me (turning my back and raising my arm and walking away): “WATER, IS OVER HERE!”

This was to be a roving party and our next stop was the shoe department (are they pandering or what?). I took off my name badge and wandered around the store like a real customer, found the end point (7th floor furniture) put my name badge back on and told the gatekeeper I was just a little early. In I went.

I bought my copy of Sleep is for the Weak and found a comfy couch to rest my feet (did I mention I was wearing heels?). Others soon migrated that way and the caterers started passing hor douvres the tiny French dip sandwiches were absolutely delish!

I found @Geekmommy, @sendchocolate, @shannonrenee and @digitalsista to hang out with and it was a very nice evening.

At one point when we got back to the hotel, I ran into Casey, she approached me and welcomed me into a hug. I told her how inspiring she is to me (and how freakin adorable her Moosh is) and she was gracious enough to take a picture with me. If nothing else happened this weekend, that would have been enough for me.

Saga V

Saturday, July 19, 2008


A new day, a second chance would I fulfill my goal of networking? Damn, I hoped so. Breakfast was again a lonely croissant and sitting off to the side of the ballroom so I would have a plug for my laptop. The morning session was fun in that the Michelin Man was there.



First break out session of the day was something that I had an interest in even though I didn’t fit the stereotype. Who We Are: Women Without Children and the Blogosphere. I was looking for some content ideas other than mommyblogging. But what I found was a room full of women who felt they were being slighted by the blogging world and others because they do not have children. Perchance this room of women needed a place to feel free to rant and that’s fine, but it wasn’t what I was looking for so I took advantage of the “two feet” rule from BlogHer and went elsewhere.



I tried to pry my body into the sardine can that was holding the Who Better Serves Women Like You: Obama or McCain? But is was beyond crowded and hot and I couldn’t hear so I will watch the video of it from Erin on Qik. We had a long time for lunch and I was again not in a socializing mode so I went up to my room and napped and moped.



Breakout number two today was one I was very interested in and it didn’t let me down at all. What We Do: There's More to Monetization than Advertising. Although a lot of it was over my head, I did my best to try to keep up and bookmark all the affiliate programs and such that were mentioned. A huge shout out to @JLongtine by the way for all his webshots throughout the sessions he was at.



Oh yeah and somewhere in between these sessions I ended up winning more from @HP_Blogs. I even wrote a limerick to win another webcam. Wanna hear it? I knew you did:
There once was a Blogger from LA
Who drove very very far away
She made friends at Hp
A she and a he
Because they were giving stuff away.
{{applause}}



I decided to skip the last session and just do some catching up on emails and Google reader (500 items!) Sitting in an almost empty Ballroom, I suppose I could have gone over to the “clique” in the corner, but they weren’t very receptive the last time I tried, so instead I just sat alone. It was then I wrote a very “naked” blog for the BlogHer site regarding my experience so far and poured my heart out (and a lot of tears as well). And it was there that I read this from Casey and again the tears and lack of self confidence came back. But because of her I reminded myself that I was only going to get out of this conference network wise whatever I put into it. So I put on my more inviting face and even smiled at a couple of people. I was approached by the girls from GM and “interviewed” about my feelings on the Malibu Hybrid. I was honest about everything and mentioned the humongous bruise on my hip. Because they were there, their peers also came and sat for the closing keynote.



The speakers this evening were blogging rock stars Dooce and Stephanie Klein. I think I was the only one in the room who had never read them (except the GM girls, I had to do a lot of explaining to one of them). There was a bit of q and a and even some drama between Dooce and The Bloggess, but really I was just sitting there trying to work up the nerve to go to the closing cocktail reception.

Saga IV

Friday evening

After the COmmunity Keynote, we were headed to the Ruby Skye dance club. Another Hot, Crowded and Loud cocktail party. I walked over by myself and couldn’t see anyone I knew enough to approach. I did have a Bossy sighting but did not get the nerve to say hi. I twittered my desolate feelings and kept sinking lower and lower into a depression. I saw an empty seat and approached, The Little Engine echoing in my brain. “Is this seat taken?” I ask. “Yes. We are saving seats for our friends.” WTF?! Bang there goes that last tiny bit of self confidence I might have had! I try hard not to cry and slink away.

Upstairs looks pretty empty maybe I will go up there. I see an empty seat and again try my “pick up line”. This time I am allowed to sit but the person next to me is even quieter than I and the other side is engrossed in their own conversation. I finally just give up and leave. I head across the street to the mini market and pick up some potato chips and a cookie and head up to my room to play pogo. I know I should have stuck it out, but honestly it just didn’t seem to be worth the effort. Did I mention how frikkin’ HOT LOUD AND CROWDED it was?! So an evening in my room with my pogo was not too too shabby, but it wasn’t fulfilling my purpose of being here.

I needed a good night’s sleep, did I mention the Heavenly beds?

Saga III

The highlight of the conference was The Community Keynote on Friday evening, some of you already read some of these people and if you don’t you should.

Best Rant
Sarah Brown, "Attention: I have some things to say about Goldfish snack crackers."
Danielle Wiley, "I am indeed a full-time mother, and yes, my daughter does watch Hannah Montana"
Megan Smith, "Michelle Obama Enjoys "The View:" A Recap"
Mr. Lady, "It’s not the fall that kills you, it’s the sudden stop."
Heather Barmore, "Guess who wants Typepad for Mother’s Day"

Blogging About Blogging
Liz Gumbinner, "I'm official! Hooray!"
Suebob Davis, "Blogging makes you lose your mind"
Stephanie Bergman, "Has Twitter Ruined Blogging?"
Zan, "Note to Self in the Age of the Internet: A Necessary Reminder"

Parenting
Casey, "The one about the overdose."
Doug, "Five going on fifteen"
Polly Pagenhart, "Thanks giving"
Lindsay Ferrier, "Every Mom Needs a Little Wiggle Room"

Letter to My Body
Yvonne, "Life Changing Words"
Schmutzie, "#744: I Nudged Him Hard, Saying: "Come, Gloopy Bastard, As Thou Art""
Jen Zug, "He should really teach all young men everywhere how to extract the truth from tired, chubby, stay at home moms"
Laurie White, "Letter to My Body, Letter to My Face"

Humor
Antonia Cornwell, "Christmas Poem"
Jenny Lawson, "High"
Evany Thomas, "Say my name!"
Deb, "Too much of a good thing?"
Angela, "The albatross and the whales, they are my brothers."

These were blogs that were submitted by BlogHer’s and chosen for their genuineness. Some are funny some are very serious and some just are. It was one of the most moving experiences of my entire life. I have always felt like I was a part of a strong enveloped female group because of the wonderful mother and sisters that I have (Amazon Van Houten Women Unite!), so to feel that same feeling in a room of 1,000+ was very overwhelming. And yet I felt very curiously alone at the same time.

Saga II

Friday, July 18, 2008

Thank you Erika for the wake-up nudge, computers are a wonderous thing. This being a Blogging convention and all the Westin hotel has graciously granted us all free wifi in our rooms and in all of the meeting spaces. It was greatly appreciated by all.

I awoke with the thought of I am going to go out there and network my ass off. Pass out my cards and just blow their minds away. Anyone who has already read my post on the BlogHer website knows this is not what happened, but let me give you a slight recap here. As I mentioned earlier, I am such a material girl. I get my badge and my schwag bag and head off to the ballroom for the opening of the conference. To what to my wondering eyes should appear? Another whole room with more schwag for me dear!

The exhibitor hall is there and I pick one of everything and make fast friends with the people at the HP booth (remember them, they are our friends). I head over to the Norton Symantec booth and get a complete overhaul of my security system on my laptop and a cleaning of all the crap that came with and I never knew what to do with. Fab! Very light breakfast fare of a croissant and a soda and it was time to into the ballroom. HOLY SHIT! This is huge, there are over a thousand people here. Who do I sit with? I don’t know anyone! OMG! And this is where I completely started my total and absurd freak out. I saw a familiar face of someone I had not yet met IRL (In Real Life) but who had promised to hug me so I sat with her (thank you Maria). This being the opening they decided to do a speed dating sort of intro and soon everyone was moving around. I never got the nerve to move around but I did talk to anyone that talked to me.

There were many break-out sessions to choose from and for the first round I chose Who We Are: Introversion, Blogging and BlogHer. It was crowded. Who knew this many people were as shy as me. The panelists were professed introverts and were going to tell us what tricks they used to help them. It was very informative and very helpful. I think one of the best tricks I learned was to use “Is this seat taken?” (More on that later this evening.)

Lunchtime! Yeah you know that excited me, NOT! A boxed lunch that I picked the beef off of the salad and then off to win a Twitter contest from HP, a beautiful pink wireless mouse. I have been wanting to buy a wireless mouse but have not wanted to pay the $40 for it.

Second session consisted of this: What We Do: DIY Content Syndication and Promotion. It too was crowded and HOT! But the info was good. We/I learned how to improve content and how to aim content at some search engines (google). How to use Digg, Kirtsy and Stumble to my advantage. We talked about building traffic through Twitter, Facebook and FriendFeed. Which is best for whom and how to optimize your content towards your targeted audience. If it wasn’t so damn hot in the room I would have thoroughly enjoyed this session. Break time and time to go win a new web cam from those wonderful HP people! Thanks again HP, since I have a web cam integrated in my laptop (ty Kathy) so look for a giveaway soon.

Session number three was one I was very excited about because it was being live casted with another tech conference that was happening this weekend called Net Roots. They were going to have a feed to us and vice versa so we could all intereact. The subject of this session was What We Believe: Two Concurrent Sessions: Progressives: Engaging Those Outside the Political Blogosphere in PoliticalDiscourse...and Action. It says “concurrent” because there was another room hosting a Conservative session of the same genre. Unfortunately the audio issues were quite ominous and it didn’t start out so well. There also was plenty of interaction between the two panels but nearly nothing involving the audience. I decided not to wait it out and headed upstairs for a much needed debriefing (read nap).

Saga I

I should have been updating all weekend instead of saving it til the end. When you mix my memory and my ability to procrastinate you get a lethal cocktail.

Thursday, July 17, 2008
I woke up late and was on the road by 7am. I made the decision to take the 5 and not think about the bridge on the way. I would cross that bridge when I came to it (Pun totally intended).

Getting in and out of the Malibu has been a slight problem for me. First of all it is a low sitting car and my knees do not care for that. The other is that being a person of stature (ok fine tall and fat, but stature sounds so much nicer) I usually have to put the seat as far back as possible in any car I drive. In the Malibu I didn’t have to go all the way back but I did have to put it pretty close. The seat being back that far actually puts it behind the door jam, so when entering and exiting, my hip bangs against it and I am now the proud owner of a beautiful purple and black bruise on my left hip. That is the only complaint I would have about that car.

Does everyones front passenger seat look like a techie threw up? Other than that the ride was wonderfully smooth. I am not completely certain of the actual gas mileage, I will figure that out on the ride home, but I can say I made it from Glendale to the hotel without running out of gas. (*now that I am home it looks like I averaged about 38mpg) I don’t see a close gas station so I hope I can make it a little farther when I leave.

I must admit the part of the Malibu that I was most pleased with (well, besides it being a free rental) was the XM radio. It was so nice to A: not have to search for a station; B: have so many great stations to choose from; and C: be able to do it all from the steering wheel. I listened to Robin Williams comedy act (uncensored) and kept switching between the 70’s and 80’s stations. I heard “The Streak”, “Spill the Wine” and “Convoy” within a one hour span of time. I almost called a sister. “Ethel! Ethel! Is that you Ethel? Put your clothes on Ethel!”

Traffic slowed down just over the halfway point so I pulled over for lunch hoping to wait out the traffic. Nope, an hour later they were all still sitting there. Seems somebody had the bright idea to put all the cars in one lane at some point down the road. Idiot! No worries, I have my XM to listen to.

Ok, ok, now to the part you all have been waiting for, I have begun to see signs that point me towards THE BRIDGE (dun dun dun)! At the first sight, my hands tighten on the steering wheel. My pulse races and my breathing is quickly catching up to my pulse. I can see the BRIDGE now and it is looming in front of me. It is not 10 lanes side by side as I had envisioned, but 5 lanes going one way. I maneuver my car to the middlest lane and just go trying to concentrate on keeping the eco light lit the entire time and gauging the distance via the On Star (Oh, did I forget to mention the On Star, yeah I used that for turn by turn navigation and it is so much better than a GPS system because mainly it breaks into the radio and announces you next move). Anywhoo, I made it and was very proud of myself. I immediately made the obligatory phone calls to those that would be proud of me and they dutifully were.

Upon arriving at the hotel there was a mix-up with the reservation (since I was a late addition to someone else’s room) but it soon was straightened out and I was happily ensconsed in a room that made Erika’s Chicago room look like a shelter, oh wait, nevermind it looked like a shelter before mine mocked it. After a quick relax and freshen I am whisked from my room by Erin (@QueenofSpain) and taken to socialize in the lobby. I so don’t socialize.

I did find my way to the momCentral party and picked up my first bag o’ schwag. BOOKS! Lot’s of them! I am such a material girl. I can’t approach someone I read everyday face to face, but stick a table of schwag in front of them and I can talk my head off. I head back upstairs to lighten my load and meet my room mate Karoli. We head out to the Newbie reception which is on the 32nd floor to which the only access is an outside elevator that shimmies and shakes. And did I mention the outside part?! Ugh. But hell, I did the Bridge I can do some stupid elevator. The intent (or so I thought) of this reception was to bring together a bunch of people who had never been there before and try to give them an orientation of sorts. I didn’t get that feeling from it at all. It was a bunch of people milling about. There was no facilitating, no orientating, no nothing, from what I saw. It was hot and crowded and loud so we each picked up a free drink and headed downstairs to The People’s Party. Guess what? It was hot and crowded and LOUD! But it had a great schwag bag and free drinks (alcohol is plentiful, water and diet soda not so much. More on that at Macy’s). A little networking and meeting of people was happening but really how can you network inside a frikkin’ woofer? It was way to loud for me and I headed back up to the room for a well deserved sleep after a very long day. Did I mention the Heavenly beds?

GM Chevrolet Malibu Hybrid

The Malibu has arrived! w00t! w00t!

Ain't she pretty? I'm calling her Brid, as in Hy Brid!

She is not only beautiful on the outside, but on the inside "where it counts".
This is her lovely Temperature Control Panel and her darling XM Radio and iPod outlet.

And would ya get a load of how trim and slim everything is, she definately takes good care of herself.

I'm taking her out on some errands so we can get to know each other a little before we "do the big deed" together tomorrow. Maybe I'll even buy her dinner first.

Anxiety

I was talking to my physical therapist the other day about how best to take care of my knees during my trip to SF. His main pice of advice was to take a trolley tour and not try to walk around on the hilly streets. Not a problem my hotel room is in the same hotel as the conference so I won't be outside much. I am not able to attend the main thingy on Sunday so I may look into a trolley tour at that point.

I then asked about the drive up since sitting in one position for a long time is very painful on the knees. He suggested stopping every hour or so to stretch. Check I can do that.

We started discussing the drive, according to mapquest (since Maggie was kidnapped) I should take the 5 for a really long time to the 580 (yes you midwesterners I said THE) and then in to the city I go. Bob, my physical therapist, claims it is a great ride, especially the end when you cross the bridge into the city. HUH!?!?! A bridge you say?!?!?!?! WHA?!?!?! I have to go over a bridge? Oh gah!

I have gone over huge bridges before, but those of you that know me, know that I sometimes weep/cry/wet myself when faced with those situations. I was told I could take the 101 and bypass the big ass bridge, but the 101 is longer and is actually more of a highway than a freeway - think stoplights along the way. Ugh.

So I sit and think and I figure I am going to a conference that is all about empowering women and I decide to put my big girl panties on and just do it!

But I still might cry a little.